You'll Never Guess The One Miserable Ex-ESPN Staffer Who Took Offense To Shane Gillis' ESPYs Monologue

Shane Gillis did America a solid during the ESPYs on Wednesday, and gave us the perfect template to help us separate the Libs from the sane folks. 

If you laughed at his monologue, you're a normal human. If you found it offensive, you're a loser who needs to mix in a drink every once in a while to ease the tension. Free advice. You're welcome! 

For those who missed it, Gillis put on a Hall of Fame performance during the opening few minutes of an otherwise miserable awards show, taking shots at the WNBA, Deshaun Watson and Bill Belichick. He also mixed in some solid Jan. 6 jokes, and at one point said Trump wanted to deport Juan Soto. 

A masterclass, unless, of course, you're Sarah Spain. This Sarah Spain, man. I'm telling you. I mean, it must be so miserable being her. I couldn't imagine. 

Seriously, just for a second, imagine getting so worked up over a monologue that you go TWEET about it at 1 a.m. Imagine living that sort of life. 

Incredible. But, OutKick fan-favorite Sarah is living proof that it's possible. God Bless:

Thank you, Shane Gillis

In a year of crazy growth for women's sports choosing an ESPYs host who doesn't even try to make clever jokes about women athletes (he at least *attempted* for the men) he goes with hacky "no one knows the WNBA" bits, "Pinoe is a bad time" & repeatedly insults Black women. COOL..

Bravo, Sarah! You're officially the most insufferable person on the planet. At least for now. I'm sure some other Lib will chime in before lunch and completely shove you out of the top spot. For now, though, you're on the pole. 

Like I said, it's so easy to spot a Lib after Shane's performance last night. The crowd, clearly, was full of them, which made the whole thing that much better. The awkward laughs. The silence. The sheer nervousness that was permeating throughout the building. 

You could feel it through your screen. The tension was amazing. And Shane just kept powering through. 

He made jokes about Caitlin Clark fist-fighting black women at Waffle House. He made Viagra jokes about Bill Belichick. He fooled an entire crowd of pandering Libs into clapping for a black woman who they thought was a four-time WNBA all-star. 

She wasn't! She was just a regular person! Amazing. 

I mean, it was perfect. No notes. Perfection. 

He made Epstein jokes. Rapinoe jokes. Trump jokes. ICE jokes. You know how I know it was good, beyond Sarah bitching about it? 

The fact that ESPN hasn't socialized one single thing from his monologue. Not one! Imagine the meetings in Bristol today. God, I'd love to be a fly on that wall. 

Thank you, Shane. You did us a solid. Salute.